Saturday, January 26, 2013

Prison in my head

Contours and crevices
Make brilliant illusions of depth
In the two dimensional world
The prison inside my head
The bruises and scars have healed
The pain has somehow regressed
Yet the shadows of the bars
Are still prevalent in my precept
A rebel in my own domain
A martyr with intellect
Challenged by the shame
Of a past that I regret
Every fairytale and fantasy
Has an ending that's inept
Yet it magically invites me
To a world of hidden prospect
It allows me to be the woman I see
Whom I've always tried to protect
Allowing myself to finally be free
In a story only I can perfect!

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Alone

Alone
With no one to hold me tight
I cry
Not truly understanding the reasons why
I'm here
Everyday is a struggle to survive
More tears
No courage or strength to continue the fight
The fear
Takes over and the battle is lost
The pain
Of love always comes with a cost
I remain
Numb without anyone to trust

But I push on waiting for a miracle
Hoping for the best
Yet each day that passes by
Continues looking like the rest

Again
I have lost my sense of self
To doubt
Wishing for an easy way out
I smile
While wiping my tears away
Discouraged
Just trying to make it through today
Jaded
Never did I deserve to feel this pain
Tormented
Trapped inside and hidden by lies
I'll say it once again
I'm alone

Yet somehow I find a way
By hoping for the best
That all this hurt's not in vane
But simply just a test

I'm unfocused
Deceived by the many I've met
I believed
I had nothing but the past to forget
The future
Holds nothing of interest to me
I wait
Hoping the world will help me see
I'm wrong
And I'm my only enemy
Yet still
The pain lingers and I'm engulfed
With misery
Dying for a resolution

No miracles in sight
Unable to get some rest
I fight a losing fight
Not knowing what is best

Enraged
By the wrong you've done to me
Engaged
In the darkness trying to flee
From hate
Yet I have no where I can run
Because
I am alone
So cold
The world has proven to be
No remorse
Casting shadows over me
I'm alone
Frightened by destiny

Solemn Choices

Why was it so plain for everyone to see
What you would ultimately do to me
Yet I fell into your arms so naive and lovingly
With passion in my heart but as blind as blind can be

Why was it so obvious to those who weren't there
What was it about you that told them you didn't care
Yet I listened to your words that were utterances of air
With stupidity on face and ignorance a'flair

A man below my level given an equal chance
Loved with all my heart despite your circumstance
Unconditional support with unlimited helping hands
Here forever always yet you chose to turn your back

Never will I understand the choices that you made
Never will I forgive the hurtful games you played
Never will I release myself from the imprisonment of pain
Never will I let myself fall in love again

Why did I go and do this absent minded thing
What was it about you that made my jaded heart sing
When I already knew the sorrows that only man can bring
I let you in, I let you in... I only have myself to blame

Friday the 13th

Moments away from sleep
Shots break out and I rise
Semi-automatic, pop nineteen times
Echos in the air
Stale with cries of grief
Pop pop pop off go another three
Silence chills my bones
Cause I know it'll only be brief
Life in the hood
So I've heard
Numb to the sound of death
I lay back down
Another lost soul lost
I wonder who it was
Twelve minutes have just passed
And the second disturbance comes
Sirens moving slowly
Followed by more guns
One car zooms past
Not a single culprit around
A second car flies by
On a mission racing time
Living by the badge
Such an honourable code
Soon the rest will come
And maybe a life we'll save
Though it's highly unlikely here
It's probably the grave
Calling out in the cold winter's breeze
The ambulance, the firement
And look, the police
Delayed on other calls
I guess it's Friday the thirteenth
Not your lucky day homey
Here comes the homicide truck
Driving by and down the block
I'm sure it's to your crib
To draw a line of chalk
Investigative crime scene
Another unsolved sin
Living in the hood
Numb to the pain within
Safe in a haven of ignorance
Hidden from the rage
Dying to get out
On the humble prayers of chance
Faced with reality
But only from a distant glance
I take a look at my dream
And continue to create my destiny
I don't belong in the hood
I gotta get away
I need to move my babies
Before regrets are made

Eternal Flames

Mmmmmmmm Oh oh whoa oh
It's so hard to see your flame shining in the light
but in the night your heart shines eternally bright
Through the tears I shed for love I've lost
The memories replay and live on... you live on

In my heart, In my mind I don't have to let go
In my body and soul, you will live on I know
My sorrows and pains may bring me to tears
But through it all I will remember you most
When you turned frowns upside down
And laughter from tears
In my heart, in my mind, I don't have to let go
In my body and soul you will be remembered forevermore

Taken from a world of misery and pain
Remembered through all the heartache
Brighter with each day that passes
Your flame grows stronger
Never forgotten
Living eternally in the hearts of others

In my heart I don't have to let go
In my mind I refuse to say no
In my body and soul forevermore
An eternal flame burning bright
A fire within that helps me fight
Though tomorrow may come
And you won't be here
In my heart where you belong
So I have no fear

Times are hard and I wish you were close
Within arms reach
Not a distance voice
Heard in my heart of eternal flames
Saying the show must go on
Discipate the pain
Share my joys my love my songs
Share the wonders my one true love
Share the magic
Stay strong
Rise above and continue burning bright
Never ever give up
I am here where I belong
Eternal flames
Eternal flames

Freedom

I'm not sure what you want
But I quest​ion how you feel
Becau​se my love'​s been torn apart​
Too many times​ for me to conse​al

You test,​ you poke,​ you prod
Looki​ng for somet​hing that isn'​t there​
You push and pull me back and forth​
Yet I'm suppo​sed to belie​ve you care

The words​ you say are heavy​
Yet hold no weigh​t comin​g from your lips
Our argum​ents are many
Casti​ng shadd​ows like an eclip​se

Darke​ning our heart​s
From the light​ that shine​s withi​n
Beggi​ng for us to part
Yet neith​er one can just give in

It's time to just let go
And seal the fate that we have chose​
Time to heal the pain
And turn our backs​ to a door that'​s close​d

Time to say goodb​ye
To somet​hing that felt so right​
Time to remov​e the shadd​ows
And walk towar​ds the light​

Love Restored

Hidden in the light 
for everyone to see
Is the love I have for you
And the love you have for me

Surrounded by the jealousy
Of a past that grew apart
Tearing in two directions
Leaving just one broken heart

Burdened by the sorrow
Of old wounds that need to heal
Patience is a virtue
Thus the secret is now sealed

Lies are told to those
Whose hearts the truth can’t bare
Waiting to unfold
The promise we both share

Fond memories recorded
In the banks of shallow shores
Living in the moment
Knowing love shall be restored